Nature Scribe Gifts

"So basically, it's an autobiomeoirography!"

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

"I like to stay on top of things."

A tree cries its leaves off like tears

Girl - 'How come they're not affecting you, mister?!' Man - 'Simple, I'm using 'Writer's Block'.'

'Researching the opossum article.'

"Regarding your letter of next Monday ... "

'Tell us about the time you met Charles Darwin, grandad.'

A writer goes sailing.

"Tests! That's one thing I don't like about the end of school. I can't believe it! You're not finished studying, either?"

Rising oceans could prevent wind power being the main power source.

"I would take out the curse words, but otherwise I think it's fine."

"Your ecosystem is pretty well shot, have you considered giving up humans?"

God's Kitchen

"But you got some good reviews too, yeah?"

"She's had work."

'...when all at once I saw a bunch, a bunch of golden daffodils...no, it still doesn't sound right.'

'It's not his name - It's what he does all the time.'

'Your moon is on Saturn. Your sun is on Venus, and your hand is on my thigh!'

"Scientists say that this will be the most outrageous summer in 500 years..."

The World of People

Bad Cheetah!!!

"It's so confusing! Explain to us again when we have to swarm and when we have to make a beeline..."

"It was a dark and stormy night...."

'No kidding! I was in that David Attenborough documentary too...'

'I've been doing a home study course. Now I can echo in three languages!'

'Snap that line!!...'

The Ambivalence of a Nice Day in February

"Mr De Winter, please! How am I supposed to portrait you if you keep doing this?"

Which useless activity are you doing on your electronic pacifier right now? My what? Your electronic pacifier. Your soother. Your binky. My iPhone is not a "binky". It's an indispensable tool, essential to keeping the busy, modern life running like a well-oiled machine. You can't stand to experience a single moment devoid of activity. Solitude makes you agitated, lonely, bored or insecure. Anytime you feel bad, you reach for your phone. It's your binky. My Twitter followers agree with me that yo

God's Seasonings

King Cnut attempts to stop the tide from coming in and destroying his sandcastle.

Raccoon Camp Nights