Nature Newbie T-Shirts

'Johnny Wilmot experiences the Grand Canyon'

"We’re not on the Upper West Side, and there aren’t any ‘better tables’!"

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

'I can't believe it... no subway, no taxis, no fast food spots, no busses within a radius of 400 meters... my gosh! I've never made such an intensive nature experience!'

'I didn't know ostriches could swim.'

"Yes, I brought just my phone and charger to our week-long survival trip. What else would I need?"

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"It's official"..."It's a drought!"

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

'Remember only you can prevent forest fires.'

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

'What the... MOM! This isn't deer! It's a yucky tourist again!!'

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

Gardener attacked by plants.

The Runaway Horse

'Life is great' down on the farm.

"First time pruning?"

Romantic Giraffes

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

“It's a tree, sweetie. No need to Google it.”

A large leaf falling on a dog

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

Polluted geese

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

Welcome Spring.

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."