Nature Humor Lovers Pillows

The natural selection process in golf.

'It's the apocalypse!'

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

'What did you do with the whale I harpooned yesterday?'

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

Antlers: A Deer with Ants for Antlers.

Turtle Trailer Court

'Big date tonight, but I've just shed an antler: Do you have superglue?'

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

Possums that ski.

"Next year we put the cats outside before we hibernate."

Buck Naked

Split the last one?

"Just the steak for me and my friend will have the carbon dioxide and the water with the sunlight."

'It's the worst possible diagnosis a bear can receive -- sleep apnea.'

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

"I'm in no great hurry to evolve."

"Are you kids going to behave, or do I have to put my foot down?!"

"I told you to stop biting your nails."

'We're all experts in one thing or another. For instance, I consider myself something of a specialist in fluid dynamics...'

'Good, lots of waxy buildup.'

"Relax, that's only Tarzan's yell!"

Sheep with its wool unwinding because it's snagged on a tree

"Excuse me, officer, but I believe I'm entitled to one mating call..."

"They're especially bold at this time of year."

Why Crabs Make Lousy Soldiers.

Seriously, try leaving them out for a day. They're delicious al dente!

"Come on, let's get a selfie and post it online before we fight to the death..."

"Mating display of the white-bellied boobie"

"I can't believe I went so long without A.C."

"It's teeth whitening."

'I'm warning you, don't come any closer! I'm fully charged with static electricity!'

Cover my mouth when I cough? with what?

"Hold on. I'll buzz you in."