Nature Lover's Humor Pillows

'morning

'The pay's good and the fresh air is great but, man, talk about a hostile work environment!'

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

Antlers: A Deer with Ants for Antlers.

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

'Big date tonight, but I've just shed an antler: Do you have superglue?'

Bird Bath.

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

Possums that ski.

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

"Next year we put the cats outside before we hibernate."

Split the last one?

"Just the steak for me and my friend will have the carbon dioxide and the water with the sunlight."

"I told you to stop biting your nails."

"I'm in no great hurry to evolve."

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

'Good, lots of waxy buildup.'

"Relax, that's only Tarzan's yell!"

"Come on, let's get a selfie and post it online before we fight to the death..."

"I can't believe I went so long without A.C."

The natural selection process in golf.

"Okay, it's agreed, - if Trump gets elected we won't be heading south for the winter."

"Yes, I'll marry you, but you understand you'll have to clean up your den right?"

Cover my mouth when I cough? with what?

'Yeah, my mum never forces me to try something new, but then again, we always eat the same thing...'

Give Chlorophyll.

"Hold on. I'll buzz you in."

'That will be $600, thank you...'

'Oops, sorry!'

"HOWL!"

'Well, yes, I guess so; the Warmington AR-20 could drop a man at 500 metres.'

Closed for Summer.

'If you're having trouble settling into a long winter's nap, try these 'hibernaton pills'!'