Nature Docu-lover Gifts

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

The Food Chain

Live Stream

"If you can’t beat ’em, roll around in their decaying carcass."

'I was told you two have a love-hate relationship. Care to elaborate on that?'

Crocodile

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

"But what's my motivation?"

'I told you to keep your rice in a plastic bag.'

'Phoor...watch these sperm whales at it...ah...yes..yes...'

Maria Sibylla Merian

'If whales are so intelligent, why do they swim near Japan?'

"Those pervs from the nature channel are filming us again."

'You've killed four warthogs, nine antelopes, two buffaloes and six gnus, but you haven't killed any zebras! Well, I call that discrimination!'

"This is a repeat. See what's on The Bird Channel."

"What can you possibly expect from my client, your honor? He's a wolf!"

Rain Forest Filmcrew

'She hunts, she brings it back, and my manhood,thank goodness, remains intact.'

"The notches on his tusks? That's the number of rivals my daddy has defeated!"

The Hidden World of Desks

'It's that bloody David Attenborough! It looks like one of us is about to die a gruesome, yet visually stunning death.'

'Police have counted the dead resulting from today's disaster. However, they suspect that some of these victims may be just playing possum.'

"Well look who's waiting with bated breath!!"

Filming the Crocodile.

"Dude, I don't mind watching your holiday video, but can you fast-forward it please..."

Field guide to North American plumbers

"Hold on, you can't attack her! Can't you see she's pregnant!"

'He's been sleeping up there ever since he saw that 'Jaguars' program on the nature channel.'

'Ambushing them is a great idea: I usually tend to charge blindly...'