Natural Living Advocate Gifts

"If you get nervous up here, just picture everyone in the audience wearing clothes!"

'I don't get it. All we eat is hay and grass, and yet we're a veritable storehouse of cholesterol.'

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

Packaging Russian Dolls

Deforestation.

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

But is it organic?

Rudolph goes green (compact flourescent nose)

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

Bottle Bank: For the Colour Blind.

"Privates Beach"

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"I have a new program that draws from his energy to power all our computers and phones. We should be good for the next 10 years."

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

Nuclear generation of energy.

'It's going to be a vegan.'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Have you got your make up on yet?

Global Warming Coming Soon!

Sustainability files, ways to reduce your carbon footprint

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

Price may vary with weather.

"Don't you think it's time you turned off those lights?"

"Your membership entitles you to 15 books,45 posters,200 leaflets and umpteen stickers!"

'I can't conceal it any longer - the food in this place is killing you.'

'More homes and wind turbines planned.'

"The Nominees"

"The tuna is endangered, the lettuce was recalled and the tomatoes were hit by a drought. I can give you mayo on a roll."

'There is nobody else. I'm afraid we've wiped out all of the other species.'

"Actually, 'Loss of Limb' would be covered under your homeowners policy."

Ecological balance.

'Call Me Old-Fashioned, But I Liked It Better When They Didn't Shave Their Armpits.'