Natural Food Advocate Gifts

'Let's try some subtractitives, to offset all the additives.'

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Desert Island Meals.

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

Queen of Quinoa

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

"Oh, no - not another farmer's market!"

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

'It's not what you think. It's not about our liberation.'

Another reason farm raised fish aren't as healthy as wild ones.

"But but ... if we remove all the additives there'll be nothing left!"

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

Vegetables VS Junk Food.

"It's a giant banana but is it an organic giant banana?"

Frankenfish

All-You-Should-Eat Buffet

'We seem to have more luck getting people to accept cookies rather than broccoli when they visit websites.'

Sawdust.

"It's time we did something about the new Healthy Menu option."

No bottle feeding.

'this is the only place where no one is fooling around with the genes.'

'I say it's spinach and the heck with it!'

Hot dog salesman - 'Early american or loaded with preservatives?'

'Wait a second! This fish is made out of TOFU!'

A psychic predicts the discovery of gluten.

'Hello - is that Jamie Oliver?'

"You can see by its smile that this halibut was humanely killed."

" Actually, Dear, I said I wanted to start eating 'all natural, not 'au naturel'!"

"All right, let's admit genetically-modified foods will have an effect on people. It's fifty-fifty it'll be a good effect."

"I'm a genetically engineered chicken substitute."

Mom's Diner. Wholesome Food. Grandma's Diner. Free Candy. Free Toys. No Spinach.

'None for me...I'm trying to eat healthy.'

'I don't get it. All we eat is hay and grass, and yet we're a veritable storehouse of cholesterol.'