Nativity Nostalgist Pillows

'The shepherds couldn't make it!'

"...and I'm saying we would've been here a lot quicker if we had used the SatNav rather than follow that stupid star."

KING HEROD INTERROGATES THE WISE MEN TO KNOW BABY JESUS'S WHEREABOUTS

"Heavens above no, I'm not the angel of the Lord. I'm the landlord from the Angel. I wondered if you fancied a pint."

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

'Oh, Christ.'

Three Parent Baby

'Never mind the price, what the hell is myrhh?'

Cut out and keep your own Baby Jesus.

Media press pack outside stable where Jesus is born

Nativity Scene on the Underground

"Gold ended the day on a new high, while frankincense and myrrh both opened well but faded as the markets closed."

'We must be close! It's the little clown of Bethlehem.'

Antique shop owner looks at old chalice, saying: 'Well, it MIGHT be worth something if it had the original myrrh inside.'

Angry Joseph in school nativity play says to Innkeeper: 'No, we did not book online.'

Three Wise Men on one camel. One says: 'We've decided to set an example by camel sharing.'

Shepherd points out the north star to 3 wisemen holding maps.

'The shepherds couldn't make it!'

'I was a stowaway on his cargo ship, and the rest is history.'

The Three Wise Women

"She's not a happy camper, he forgot to make the booking, someone's in for a silent night!"

"Uh oh! I just remembered we were supposed to pick up the midwife."

'Mail order? You said all the toys were hand-made!'

Let's stick to 'No room at the inn' and leave out 'Have you tried the internet?'

"Peace on earth. Goodwill to all men and who ordered the triple cheese with extra pepperoni?"

Wise Men.

"A birthday gift card? Really?"

Doctor telling pirate he has termites in his wooden leg.

We only follow one star round here, buddy!

"Crib, clothes, diapers, toys...All the good gifts on the registry are taken. There're only a few weird things left."

"He's coming out halo first!"

It's a girl!