National Security Staff Pillows

The Anti-Agent

"National security adviser"

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

Airport Security.

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

Privacy Conference Security

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"So, how was your day at work, Dear?"

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

"What did you think of the encryption article?"

"The club scene is really changing."

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

'Says here you can tear phonebooks in half? Well, security could use a man like you in our shredding department!'

Private Viewing

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

"Remember that requirement that you work without supervision? Forget it."

"The security scanner said I have exquisite feet."

NSA - 'Start Leakin'.'

"His name? It's 'Reggie the Drug-Sniffing Dog.'"

'It's a foolproof computer network, sir, that no one can break into, not even a kid.'

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

'The staff are healthy enough, it's the computers that keep getting a virus!'