Name Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

"Your credit rating is fine, Mr. Deadbeat. It's something else that's making lending institutions wary."

Regrettable names which probably seemed like a good idea at the time - Rainbow Moon-Child, Anarchy Scum Bag, Freemarket Share-Option, Tony.

...and in future I'm not called 'Norman Micklethwaite' but 'Howling Wolf Mackenzie'.

'Hang on a minute, haven't we already got a Tracey?'

"I'm not sure how to tell which of the 48 Smiths killed on the bus headed to the 'I can't believe we're all named Smith' reunion are going to heaven or hell."

'Tell your mother that a woman named Lance is a bad idea, Gloria.'

"He's name is Covid, you know, after that virus fingy?"

"Seriously? You're all called "Teddy" too?! I guess our parents must like conventional names..."

"Poor kid, being lumbered with a name like Kevin. What's wrong with something ordinary like Zain or Kayan?"

How to be sure you really like that baby name.

'Book of Usernames' / 'Book of Baby Names'.

'Are you willing to change your name to Bob Smith?'

Mr Long and Miss Short.

"People shouldn't have names until they're 30."

"I think I'm a pretty average Jennifer—but I think you're a very unusual Scott."

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

"His name is James Tom Dave Jon Lee Robert Glenn Joseph Tony Sam Barnes. We didn't want to hurt any relatives' feelings by not naming him after them."

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

Baptism Then and Now

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

Tom Cruise

Naming that Impala

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

'Then again, who says we can't call it a mangelwurzel?'

'I know you can make this project go. That's why I call you 'The Magic Motor'.'

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

All day I design high tech communication devices...yet at a party I'm lost without name tags.

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

"Sinead?!"

"I'm afraid pretty much every esoteric company name is taken so we're left with 'Mugwump', 'Grungydink' or 'Buh'."

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.