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When More Government Is A Good Thing

"Theo is upset that his name isn't more precious."

"We're giving her my name and his name, but we're not going to hyphenate."

The Beckham's son's name is Spanish for cross. I'd be cross if someone called me that.

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

Mom! Don't call me abominadorable in front of my friends!

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

Whoa

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"His name is James Tom Dave Jon Lee Robert Glenn Joseph Tony Sam Barnes. We didn't want to hurt any relatives' feelings by not naming him after them."

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

What should we do this fine Sunday? I have an idea. Let's spend the day staring at each other and using pet names. Ahem. You affection is making us ill! They're upset, Monkey Bear. You're so handsome. We're trying to eat!

"What a coincidence, that's my name, too!"

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

"Are you the one they call El Cóndor?"

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

Mort Park! You mean Killer. You're sprung, Killer. I'm free to go? Unless you're so tough now you'd rather stay. I mean a guy named Killer probably likes jail. Mail me my blanky.

Bouncing baby

Naming that Impala

'We got Spot and Fluffy when it rained cats and dogs. You came in a baby shower.'

"… She's simply asking that you no longer refer to her as 'the dog.'"

Tom Cruise

'I know you can make this project go. That's why I call you 'The Magic Motor'.'

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

Dear Sadie, I'm just an aging Baby-Boomer who still believes in America, and sees all the good around me, but I don't understand why we've become so mean. How can I feel good about us again? Signed, Marlemarion. Great question. There's an easy answer as to how you can feel better about the world. Change your name to something normal! I just don't agree with the @#$% premise that we've gotten mean.

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

What really became of the boy named Sue.

"This is Dakota, Bodie and Scout—And our dog, Richard."

"It's from HQ, they're replacing me with a younger man!"

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"

1,001 names to Embarrass Your Child for Life.