Myth Reader Gifts

Fairtale prosecutions.

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

Mini tennis players playing on table tennis court.

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

"Confounded spell checker... never catches anything."

Sisyphus visits Stowe

"Wifey! Wifey! I've found the fountain of youth!"

"I know. But I think I can change him."

Emma's Unicorn

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

Pirates

Ok, ok, last page.

'The bailouts worked, the stock market shot up to 15,000 and everyone was relieved.'

A spy

"I want to try other kinds of fruit."

"Look, we're three thousand years old. No one's going to hire us."

'Ha! You moron! How did you manage to use all nine of your lives at once?'

A not-so-bright vampire with Seasonal Affective Disorder.

'We'd better speed up the Eve project -- Adam's got himself an imaginary playmate.'

'We should have removed that sign.'

"Sometimes, late at night, I do wonder, 'is he laughing at me or laughing with me?'"

'I thought I heard a twig snap.'

'Who are you trying to fool, that's a beach towel.'

"I didn't hear the full story, but you came from either the stork or ebay."

"Of course I got rid of him...in my own way."

"I'm all over the Internet, so why hide? I might as well come out and enjoy myself."

"Of course I was speeding - how else am I going to visit billions of households in one night?!"

'Hello, my name is Death'

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

Wash and Go...to hell...

'Cause of death is still unknown. We hope to learn more once he's dead'

'Hi, my name is Daniel.' 'And I am Thor,' thinks his penis.

'Nine out of ten witch doctors stranded on an island prefer eyes of newt over bat wings for a headache.'

The Lady of the Lake stabs a duck.

'Mr. Stork, tell my little brother where he came from.'