Mystical Communicator Gifts

"Even if I did believe that he was communicating through you. I'm afraid it's too late to change the will now."

Psychic TV Guru & Cellular Phone Commercial Spin.

Seance: That line is currently busy...would you care to keep holding?

"I used to get images, now it's all text messaging."

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

'There is no past. No future. Only the present, which is changing every instant. Time is merely an illusion. Got it?'

Michael Jackson - Mission fulfilled.

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"I speak Latin, you know."

'Modern romance'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'When you pray, does God have call waiting?'

School nativity. Boy says: 'If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this drama ...'

"I'll check and see if he's available."

A voodoo doctor.

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

"Oh, it's you, I'm glad I picked up.You wouldn't believe how many annoying telepathicmarketing calls I get."

You make me feel more like a veterinarian than a psychiatrist, Al. Why is that, Dr. Kapuchnik? Because you're one sick puppy.

"Here's a draft of my speech, Accounts Receivable as Collateral When Obtaining Asset Based Lending. Make it pop."

'Insofar as all parties have agreed to mediation, I've taken the liberty of hiring a medium.'

'You know me, I'm a problem solver. I listen. I flirt with understanding. I move on.'

'You will be reincarnated as someone who undergoes past life regression.'

"I see that, but can you play well with others?"

"I've been feeling more transparent."

"Hear me, for the Lord has given me an exclusive."

Shakespearean Actor

A self-filling prophecy.

"It's your mother. She wants to know why you never summon her."

Have a nice day, if you are already having a nice day please disregard this notice. (reading letter at mailbox)

'Quit interrupting me. You were always doing that.'

Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence. We received a communication fro Alpha Centauri, but it appears they just pocket dialed us.

'I have to hang up now. I'm getting some static on another line.'

'...George isn't in right now, but you can email him at...'