Music Humor Fans Pillows

Quatre-mains

Mikado

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

Raised by Dogs

'Hon, I'm home!'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'We found you in a cabbage!'

Tequila Mockingbird

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

"Maybe I'm aiming too high...maybe 'saving for a cool car' is too hard."

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

Note Book

The return of the four sheepskins

'Guess who's teething?'

"I'm sorry, but your child just isn't very sharp. But don't worry. It's perfectly natural."

'Henry, cut that out.'

Musical Eye Test

'Okay, so it's not a violin, but he is playing our song.'

'You've made a breakthrough in FINANCIAL research?', 'Yep! - I split the ATM!'

'That's what I'm talkin' about!'

"Relax, he could just be looking for fun."

Musical Note Nail

"Oh you kids and that cursed painting in the closet keep me young."

"What?!"

Under New Mismanagement

Blues for now.

'Hi! I'm a freshman -- when do I get corrupted?'

Beer Lunch

"When you said we were going to push the boat out tonight, I thought you meant we were going to a fancy restaurant!"

Sure, snoring is a big issue at our house too: you've seen the size of my dad's nose...

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

Sawrd Fighting

Clairvoyant - I want to divorce my husband. He's having an affair next week.