Muscle Showdown Admirer Gifts

'I'll be glad when this guy's large muscles cause him to tire badly during these late rounds.'

Powerful Love.

The rock caricature

Biceps, muscles and brawn

"How long have you lived in this gym?"

'Yes, I do a lot of rowing. How could you tell?'

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."

Basic training w/ GI Joe, Rambo, Bruce Lee, etc.

The size of a man's upper body is directly proportional to the number of unresolved issues in his head.

"Well dudes, gotta go. My honey needs a lot of attention."

Joe's Gym: 'Can anyone here open this jar of pickles!?'

'Of course he does - all snakes have great abs!'

Built and Built without a permit.

Sadie, the way you objectify football players is unconscionable. It's what? All you talk about are their muscles, square jaws, animal intensity. Ooh. What? I live it when you get all puffed up and macho and tough. And what biceps. Much better. Well played. Girl does what she's got to.

A muscle pushing a body builders brain out of his skull.

Dog Weightlifting

"His prose is so muscular."

Musical Fight

A doctor calls a body builder to perform a patella tap test on a large patient.

'It's me, Santa... I've had work done.'

'Just a few more steroids and I get-a-chopping!'

"Sosa's great, but McGwire is my hero."

Pushy Coach.

'Your 'guns' are very impressive Norman,but not at work.'

'My ex-boyfriend is just here to pick up his bodybuilding magazines. You can come in if you promise not to pick a fight.'

Have you ever sued anyone for slander or libel, Randy? Indeed I have, little buddy. It was 1979. Francis Melba stood up in the middle of the cafeteria and accused me - in front of all the other kids - of being "nothing special." So I stood atop my table, ripped my shirt in two, slowly smoothed out my mustache, and then proceeded to flex my pecs, one at a time. HOJ. The sunlight streaming in through the windows scattered off my bouncing pecs like a disco ball. That's when Melba knew he was toast.

"The guy who wants to be my boyfriend has the body of a god - buddha."

'Sorry Mum, but the silly haircut kind of ruins my body builder image...'

Arnold Schwarzenegger.

"What?! You didn't say nuthin' about this bein' a yo' mam joke battle!"

"Hercules hiscules"

A Washboard Stomach.

"The poison ivy has pretty well cleared up, so we'll ratchet back on the topical steroids."

'Under this blubber, pal, there are abs and muscle you wouldn't believe!'

A Body Builder has his picture taken behind a cardboard cut out of a body builder.