Murphy's Law Enthusiasts Gifts

'I've lost my job, my wife and kids, the house, what the hell else could possibly go wrong?!"

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

Wal-Mart Ruling

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

"He'll only talk when his lawyer's present."

Violent Crime Statistics

Lady Justice.

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

'Center for the Study of Murphy's Law' (Closed today because everything that could go wrong, did go wrong.)

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

"Impartiality becomes you."

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

Baby's first words.

'I don't believe in pressuring my children. When the time is right, they'll arrive at the default choice and go to law school.'

"We, the jury, award the plaintiffs 100 trillion dollars - just because."

"To be honest, I'm not sure if you marking your territory is legally binding in a boundary claim dispute."

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

'Your honour, we find the defendent 'politically incorrect'.'

'Whoops. There goes one of my prostheses.'

Counsel examining witness

Two lawyers in a royal court