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The End is Nigh.

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Use your imagination.

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

"I need him to stop think and start listening."

Statue turns into conductor when it snows.

Rodin's Cattle-Grid

"Except for that wall socket, the whole damn thing is a trompe-l'oeil."

'Do you have a longer straw?'

The Thinker / The Kiss.

Rodin's THE FEELER

"Oh no! Some self-obsessed, anti-social bastard has graffitied over your graffiti!"

George Papandreou.

"He begged his wife and kids to join him in Tahiti, but he didn't mean a word of it, the bastard."

The Thinker and the Doer.

How information mingles in our brains

Man getting hot looking at picture of desert.

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

"Their punishment for burning me in effigy would have been much more severe had they not managed to so beautifully capture the soulful vulnerability of my deep-set eyes."

"Hmmm...I wonder what the artist is trying to say...?"

"Best idea I ever had, those murals."

'Yes, I'm very excited. I really think that I will make my mark as a surrealist miniaturist.'

'Man, I'm sick of thinking...can't someone flip on a T.V. or something?'

Police lineup

'Oh I'm keeping abreast of it.'

Woodpecker carves David out of tree.

"The last doggy bag."

Sculptor explaining to tourist in Trafalgar Square that sculpture of pigeon is called 'Retribution - it actually doubles as a giant privy!'

Skinhead guppy.

Artistic Grammar … Van Gogh. Van Going. Van Gone.

A Night In the Art Gallery

"I call it angle-poise"

Little girl imitating a painting in an art gallery

Stonehens

Alberto Giacometti.