Movie Directors Gifts

Woody Allen

Alfred Hitchcock

"Looks like we found the issue."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"Bond James, Bond."

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

Showbiz Awards

James Bond in a Snow Globe

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

Benedict Cumberbatch

Director/Action Man toy.

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

Herman Mankiewicz

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

Golfing Boss

Bo're'droom

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'