Moved To A New House Pillows

'...Actually...we're trying to find our house...'

Lawn mower - must get longer cable

'Your wife's still got the guard-dog, then?'

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

Let's get organized

Domestic Superheroes!!

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

Painting by the numbers for adults

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

Doing the borders.

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

Second hand furniture.

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"We thought we would come somewhere remote to self-isolate."