Motto Maker Gifts

Life, love and a lot of bananas.

"Steamed vegetables."

"I didn't say my dog ate my homework. I said Russian bots ate my homework."

"The only problem with living at the top of a mountain is the constant stream of people coming to ask stupid questions."

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

"I have a feeling this is gonna be one tough course."

'The kids want a new motto: instead of 'slow but sure' they've come up with 'fast and funky'.'

"Better to have had ice cream and lost it than never to have had ice cream at all."

'Actually, I was hoping for a more inspiring mission statement.'

"Should we take pics of our feed for Instagram?"

'I hate it when I have to talk on my phone.'

You Don't Have To Be Crazy To Work Here But You Will Be After The Training.

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

"Regarding your letter of next Monday ... "

'That's it agreed then - the company's new motto is going to be 'We didn't do anything illegal'.'

"We should take life one step at a time." "OK, but not right now...there's some dogs do-do right in front of us!"

"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."

Mr. Tatnall's daycare "Just don't kill each other"

'Once you're done photographing me, would you please turn the camera on yourself? I always post photos of my food online.'

"I love binge watching streamed content."

"Just wait until you read my tweets."

"Get a hold of yourself, Jerry! We ALL knew the risks we were taking with the new corporate motto. When you care, it's easy to get hurt!"

'My motto is 'What happens at this company, stays at this company'. That's why I take your performance and keep your wage.'

'Remember, Junior, in business, you're nobody until somebody loathes you.'

'...so then I said 'your camera is stealing my soul' and he said 'I'm so sorry - how can I possibly repay you?''

A word to the wise. At this morning's meeting you were referred to as the 'the bottleneck'.

"I just friended God!"

'Dang! What's the word I'm looking for?'

"There's also a link to my manifesto in the notes section—www.freewilioz.org, articles four and five, respectively."

'I can't talk... I'm in the quiet carriage.' - '3...2...1...' - 'What? I can't hear you... you're breaking up...' - 'Brace! Brace!' - 'I said 'I'm in the quiet carriage'!!!' - 'Irony crash.'