Motto Maker Gifts

Life, love and a lot of bananas.

"Steamed vegetables."

"I didn't say my dog ate my homework. I said Russian bots ate my homework."

"The only problem with living at the top of a mountain is the constant stream of people coming to ask stupid questions."

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

'The kids want a new motto: instead of 'slow but sure' they've come up with 'fast and funky'.'

"I have a feeling this is gonna be one tough course."

"Better to have had ice cream and lost it than never to have had ice cream at all."

'Actually, I was hoping for a more inspiring mission statement.'

'I hate it when I have to talk on my phone.'

"Should we take pics of our feed for Instagram?"

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

You Don't Have To Be Crazy To Work Here But You Will Be After The Training.

"Regarding your letter of next Monday ... "

Too Many Genocides

"Gosh, this reminds me of one of my favorite John Lennon lyrics: "Life is what happens to you while you're making other quarterly sales plans."

Obama II

'That's it agreed then - the company's new motto is going to be 'We didn't do anything illegal'.'

"My Instagram feed is basically people, dog food and tennis balls."

"We should take life one step at a time." "OK, but not right now...there's some dogs do-do right in front of us!"

"Get a hold of yourself, Jerry! We ALL knew the risks we were taking with the new corporate motto. When you care, it's easy to get hurt!"

'Once you're done photographing me, would you please turn the camera on yourself? I always post photos of my food online.'

Athletes today strive to build their own brand. That receiver needs to catch that pass and have a catchphrase.

"I love binge watching streamed content."

Mr. Tatnall's daycare "Just don't kill each other"

'My motto is 'What happens at this company, stays at this company'. That's why I take your performance and keep your wage.'

"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."

"Just wait until you read my tweets."

'Remember, Junior, in business, you're nobody until somebody loathes you.'

'...so then I said 'your camera is stealing my soul' and he said 'I'm so sorry - how can I possibly repay you?''

"I just friended God!"

Fenton, Griff, Wintz & Barkins - Attorneys-at-law: The Legal We Do Immediately, The Illegal Takes a Little Longer

Twitter Terror

'Dang! What's the word I'm looking for?'

"There's also a link to my manifesto in the notes section—www.freewilioz.org, articles four and five, respectively."