Mother-son Duo Gifts

Valley girl mothers.

Young golf ball getting "the talk".

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"Papi, will you play build-a-model-rocket-so-we-can-calculate-acceleration-rates-and-thrust-levels-for-maximum-payload with me? Please?!"

"Tommy? Hi, this is daddy. How's my big boy? Sweetie, daddy needs your help."

"You don't need a duck call. I can just download this Find-a-Fowl app."

It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother. Why's that? House of Java .Net Cybercafe. Because how a man treats his mother is a good indicator of how he'll treat a girlfriend. That's why I created an app that calls your phone and displays a photo of you hugging your mom whenever a gorgeous lady is within three feet of you. It also displays a nice, sweet lady whenever you're within three feet of your mom.

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

"Your mother says 'wear a bra'."

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."

'Let daddy know if you get a bite.'

Yeah, that's mine - My mom puts my name inside my helmet in case it comes off.

"Mom can really push my buttons. She installed them."

"All Vangundy is or ever shall be he owes to his mother."

"Now pay attention when mother is speaking, Hubert!"

'Now that I'm King, no more of that 'Eddie' stuff, Mom.'

"I don't think so, Ted!"

"Can Mommy borrow your baby-blue pinafore tonight, sweetie?"

"Look that way! From the ground you can look up."

Good disciplinarian gaining respect vs. scary nutcase.

'It's a tough world, son. You inflate. You get kicked around all your life. Then one day - bam! You deflate.'

I had a very happy childhood, until last week when my mommy kicked me out.

As a boy, Isaac Newton ignored his father's advice to persevere, preferring instead to let things drop.

"You can be whatever you want to be, but you'll probably turn out like me."

'A cow is called 'productive livestock' because it gives milk. Parents are productive livestock, too, because they give pocket money.'

'Your father and I would rather you didn't go out tonight,Jessica dear!'

"Daddy, would you text me a bedtime story?"

'He came back home. Ran out of money.'

"Mom's new boyfriend wants to take me tropical beach fishing."

'Float this last lower left premolar, will you please?'

'Bobby, it's Dad! Look up and start running to your left, now!'

"Sure I'll teach you how to work your new computer, Dad. Of course, there'll be tuition."

'Ronan Keating just called - but it was a wrong number!'

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