Motel Adventurer T-Shirts

'We're totally jet-lagged -- Take us to Tom Bodette.'

Carefree luggage.

Airlines

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

'Those bears are so cute I wish we could have brought them home.'

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

Airport. Luggage. Baggage. Traveling used to be much less complicated.

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

Welsh airport arrivals.

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

The Professor was a brilliant botanist but a hopeless photographer.

Airport

"Your mother texted us that you're not getting enough to eat, so I brought you twice what you ordered."

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

I'm carrying a tiki torch for you!

"Waiter... my entrée fell over."

"Your driver will arrive in 4...9...17 minutes after three accidental loops around the airport."

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

Excess Baggage: Why can't airports provide a decent place for paying customers to catch forty winks?

A tourist struggling with loads of luggage

Completely out of diapers and facing a seven-hour layover, Marsha happens upon a diaper scalper.

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

Caution, Student Self-Driver

"His name? It's 'Reggie the Drug-Sniffing Dog.'"

"I'd pack light if it wasn't for the shoes."

'As a matter-of-fact I didn't pack my own bags...Well,well, well...Speak of the devil!'

"Could you have a quick look at my molar? I can't afford a dental x-ray."

Bed and Breakfast

'Eh, love. The one armed bandit at the end of the bar isn't working.'