Mosquito Humor Appreciator Gifts

'I always try to get him to come out and have a drink with me, but noooo...it's always the same excuse about how male mosquitoes don't suck blood. Whatever. I'm over it.'

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

Bob had to confront his fear of butterflies.

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

"Yo, Eunice – don’t leave me hangin’."

'A cheeky red?'

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

Lactose Intolerant

"I think therefore I am." "Bow Wow, Bow Wow, Bow Wow."

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

The height of fashion in 1796

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

"It's been moved that we adjourn for an afternoon nap. Is there a second?"

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

'Those bears are so cute I wish we could have brought them home.'

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

"That’s great, but where’s the Frisbee?!"

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

'I'll be darned! A nipple mood ring!'

"Well....I could've done this!"

'Well, he actually behaved pretty well for the first few minutes of the wedding ceremony....'