Morning Challengers Pillows

Man wakes to his bedside digital clock which reads: It's Time.

'Getting my children to get out of bed and go to school was hard - So I bought a cattle-prod...'

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

Back to work...

"That's a big fat lie!"

"How about a little more coffee?"

"Ack! This stuff's hard to eat!"

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

AI

I am coffee and I need more coffee

"I hate to sound like a sergeant, Ralph, but it's ten minutes to six."

'Gravity wins - again.'

"It would keep me awake all night, but I'm up for a game of coffee pong first thing in the morning."

'In our thirty years of marriage she's squirreled away loads of money, but she can't remember where.'

Clive would be lost without his morning heart starter.

'Sorry I'm late - My sundial didn't go off.'

"Uggh! Who am I?" 'Rory Bremner wakes up with a hangover'

"Don't rush me! I won't be much of a busy bee if I don't get my second cup of coffee."

"It's thrilling to watch them come out in the morning, ready for the kill!"

'It's a true real scientific fact! If I don't open my eyes, today will go away!'

I'll bet with age would come wisdom, if only we would remember a @#%* thing.

Alarm

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

"I never have a good excuse to be late: The teacher knows my dad wakes me up at dawn..."

"It's someone's turn to make the coffee..."

'Was the class too early for you?'

In the Days Before Coffee

Monday Checklist.

"Don't you have a snooze button?"

"I didn't think this shift was ever going to end, YOU are in for a long day my friend, and water-bottle is going to have to come in early."

'Good Morning!'

'All right, all right, I'm getting up.'

'Was the interview too early for you?'

"Oops, sorry new guy, I guess I forgot to mention he's not a morning person..."

'I'm running late again this morning...' - '...in the vain hope that somebody will fire me.' - 'Gah. My life is ridiculous.'