Monster Catcher Gifts

"Why do you suppose it's only the kids who spot us?"

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

'Take a few days off. Suck some necks ...'

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

Dead Funny

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

The Loch Ness Rowing Team

"Technically he's a zombie but we'll market him as a hybrid."

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

Dog tricks. 'He's doing it right now. Dudley dreams in Technocolor!'

"I don't care what you thought you saw,l there are no such things as people"

"I had that nightmare again where everyone found out I'm in my late thirties and still have no idea how the stock market works."

Myths and legends...

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

"I accidentally hit 3 keys and then hit enter. CTRL + Z didn't get rid of it. Can we keep it as a pet?"

"You think you're a monster because you have poor self image."

'Rock.' - 'Paper.' - 'Boris.'

'Harvey, did you notice what a beautiful full moon we have tonight?'

Horror Stories.

Unemployed recession: the irony is killing me

'Halloween is just around the corner, kids. Have you decided what are you going to wear?'

"Same goash-darn thing every full moon, eh, Mr. Harper?"

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

Monsters won't eat you if they're not hungry. So, each night, Mom makes it a sandwich. If I keep my room tidy.

"Stan, it's come to my attention that you have been creeping people out at work."

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

'I've got this splitting headache.'