Money Mischief Lover Gifts

'Give me a mortgage!...'

Playing pig

'Get up or I'm sending in the cat.'

'I thought my appointment was for a TB screening.'

Ponzi-Mat Vending Machine

The Tooth Ferret

'Don't you ever knock?'

'Casey laughed so hard at lunch milk came out his nose...or as we say now... he had a liquid food malfunction.'

'The king wants a gesture, not a jester.'

Professional football.

"More important than money?! There's only one thing more important than money and that's more money!"

"Of course there's emotion in business. Has your heart never skipped a beat at the sight of a long string of zeros after a seven."

'Yes doctor, it did hurt when you did that!'

Halloween health & safety.

'It's 10pm, does anyone know how much the U.S. dollar is worth?'

Obstruction of justice? Yeah, I can give you something for that.

'You're fine. Now get out of my office!'

The Panama Hat Trick

"Every year it's harder and harder to get their attention."

"Dad's half asleep. He was using the fly swatter to flip the pancakes."

Cash being poured onto an executive's desk.

'Gives me a lift.'

'My trust fund manager makes me wear it.'

Hey, wait a sec … Forget it! If you think I'm letting you off the hook for forgetting our anniversary, think again! Didn't you also accuse me of forgetting it just a couple of months ago? What date were we hitched? Don't change the subject.

'Love what you've done with the place.'

"Hey, I'm just happy to be making an obscene amount of money."

HMS Pinafore

'What do you mean overdraft? I still have 12 cheques left. '

"It didn't work -- My imaginary playmate refused to take the rap."

'They get along beautifully. The dog thinks he's a cat, and the cat thinks she's a dog.'

Larry didn't get the 'Casual Friday' is now 'Calling In Sick Friday' memo.

"He's been having an illicit affair with his money for years."

"We're the perfect couple-he loves making money and I enjoy spending all of it."

"Worst case of hypochondria I've ever seen."

'I want to make a withdrawl from our joint account. From my wife's half.'