Money-minded Monarch Gifts

'The prince and the princess lived happily ever after on their profits from capital-appreciation funds.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

Cord cutter

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

'I think we may have an income problem.'

Financial Eyesight

'Money, money, money, that's the only three things you ever think about.'

"I don't wear jewelry, but cash is nice."

"He's very well off. He's got all the quantities I admire."

"Let's be honest here and admit we're targeting the 'stupid-with-their-money' demographic."

"It's not the Royal Navy who'll be the death of us, it's the damned capital gains taxes."

"I'm savings. Investing is across the hall."

"Beneath this calm exterior, I'm obsessed with making profits."

Pollution and money

"The government wants us to wear these bonus hazard suits."

"I'm not sure you're taking this bonus cap thing seriously."

'And briefly, what is it that attracts you to a job in banking?'

"My third and final wish is for money and wealth—again!"

Not My Coronation Quiche

'Oh, we would never throw money at anything...we love money too much.'

'OK, here's the play, based on your prorated salaries...'

"And remember, son, perception isn't reality - money is."

"Forget the children, consider staying together for the sake of your finances!"

'It's not quite as bad as it looks - they're only witholding payment until we publish our expenses.'

'I like green tea. It's the color of money.'

Money Hog

"Always borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect to be paid back."

"The big money is in development? Now you tell me?"

"Retirement plan? Nobody here makes enough to afford to retire."

'That's the first Dollar I ever made -- I'm thinking of converting it to Euros.'

'I'm on the throne!'

Enlightenment $5. Hey, I gave you a twency. Where's my change. Change comes from within.

'Look - decide. Are you going to launch an attack on tradition, or make a few bob?'

"I'm working harder than I ever have, but all I get out of it is larger and larger paychecks."