Mom Squad Member Gifts

Baby Mums.

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

'I don't see why I have to pick it up. I'm not responsible for the law of gravity.'

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

"I guess for me family planning is just a study in fertility."

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

'If you take this job, you will need child care... that's my second job.'

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

"We both see Ben as this summer's breakout child."

"It's bold! It's moving! It's inspired! But what is it?"

"Never mind Benjamin – he just lawyers-up to get attention."

Why moms make bad refs.

Complete the jigsaw puzzle of your life

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

It's a letter from Tim. He claims his grades are improving and he might even make the DEEN's list.

"We'd love to come, but we can't seem to find a sitter."

"When Ed suggested 5 potato, 6 potato, 7 potato more, I suggested a vasectomy."

"Don't take the ones with teeth marks. They've got hard centres ."

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

'Peekaboo!'

"No, our company doesn't provide day care or maternity leave."

"And this is our son Danny's room. Danny is being raised by wolves."

"No, I don't look in the mirror. I look in the soap."

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

"I'll put this device onto flight mode when you put this plane onto flight mode."

"You're going to freeze to death! Put your coat back on."

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."