Modesty Rebel Pillows

"Oh, come on. Live a little. It's liberating."

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

'See? You call my look 'a midlife crisis' but for these guys it's a major TV series.'

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

"It's not art, really - just something I pulled out of my butt."

'That's not exactly what I had in mind when I said to clean your room.'

"He's so ostentatious about how un-ostentatious he is."

Group showers. Just one of the reasons few golfers take up football.

'I said you can't touch me - it's my religion.'

'I can't take off my clothes - I'm Missouri Synod Lutheran!'

'I'm gifted but I hide it well.'

'Give me the most soft and gentle looking unicorn tattoo you've got!'

"Knees peeking out of jeans are sexy, but what would you know?"

'I hacked into the school computer, and flunked all the teachers out.'

"More like 95% off!"

"I am wearing the new bikini you saw...unfortunately, my father saw it too, and made me wear this over it!"

Baby Boomers...Finance Your Mid Life Crisis Here!

"Finally a bit of privacy."

To Hell with Protocol, Walk In

Very little fan fair.

"He's great at keeping our litter box clean. I just wish he would do the same with his computer."

"A lot of people say that absence is my best feature."

"Are you decent?"

Ladies using thier cage crinolines as bathing machines

'Have you got anything a little less invasive?'

"Eve, how come every leaf has fallen except yours?"

'Call me anti-social if you want. The pants stay on.'

'Jon likes to think he's 'rock 'n' roll'.'

True Modesty.

"Please excuse Steve...he hates pretentiousness!"

"You just self-deprecated yourself right out of a job."