Modern Work Critic Gifts

"You do understand that I can only offer you a zero hour contract?"

"I feel your pain."

"I'm working on more of a 'personal' mythology."

Da Vinci painting a grumpy version of Mona Lisa.

'We're very tight on space right now but we'll have you in an office as soon as we can. Meanwhile...'

"Don't forget to rate us on stable-BnB."

"I think you'll like this idea-it's sort of 'dull' meets 'inoffensive.' "

"Tarzan no want computer."

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

"We encourage Theo to challenge clichés and mediocrity."

"It's the new man - he wants to know what the company retirement plan is."

"The boss is the fatherly type. He never fires anybody."

'No, we don't have casual Fridays, but we do have casual Saturdays, for employees who can't finish their work during the regular work week.'

"AI designed my statue."

Boy copying abstract artwork in an art gallery.

It finally happened, models so thin they only consist of few molecules.

'Will sublet 5pm-9am & weekends.'

'I've tried hunting, and I've tried gathering, but what I really want is a desk job.'

Clever youth stating that he considers Shakespeare overrated

"Of course nobody can make head nor tale of it, but the good news is that it's been nominated for the Turner prize next year."

'Oh, I think I know exactly what the artist is saying. He's saying; 'With a bit of luck, some idiot will buy this junk'!'

Sign on office wall says: 'Mustn't grumble.' Employee says: 'You have to admit, it's not much of a mission statement.'

'We offer a comprehensive healthcare plan, paid vacation, and a generous pension. Unfortunately, we can no longer afford to pay you a salary.'

"Have you noticed how blatant sex is everywhere in the culture but here?"

Oil on canvas/oil in barrel.

Pfft! I could do that.

"A brand new one will cost you $18. If I repair it the cost would be $397."

Cartoon Crisis. . . Biden's already causing problems!

Marie-Therese Walter

"I think 'hot desking' works better with more than one desk."

'It's hard to get good people, and even harder to keep them.'

'You go ahead. We'll rejoin you when you start using new technology.'

"I hear it's going to be a Walmart."

'Someday people will commemorate this moment with exhaustion, overindulgence, and rampant consumerism!'

'Looks like I was wrong. Apparently I can have more loathing for this era...'