Modern Twist Seeker Gifts

The Sky is falling...Now and Then.

"New brain, who dis?"

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

"Eat my dust!"

"Why didn't one of the bears just call 9-1-1 and have that girl arrested for trespassing?"

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

The evidence destroyed

Trojan horse with a satellite dish.

Rip Van Winkle, "He's survived the operation, now he's sleeping peacefully."

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

FASHION NOTESFIRST SHOES FROM ITALY

Doom & Gloom

After months of writer's block, the great man's biographer finally decides how to end the book.

'Bitter.' 'Anything else?' 'Yea - twisted.'

A man walking a bowling ball is about to walk into a woman walking a bunch of bowling pins

'Looks like the invasion has already began...'

"Hang on - I've got an app for this. . ."

'Short brown hair. Very cuddly, good in bed.'

Season's Greetings and a Prosperous New Year.

'Rapunzel, Rapunzel ... let down your hair extensions.'

'Don't worry...the built in obsolescence will kick in before your child has a chance to break it.'

"Did you watch the super bowl?"

'I've always been a great fan of yours. I wrote all your books!'

'Very steamy and sexy novel, Miss Pendergast, but how come that this Latino heart throb only services women over 70?'

"That was easy. My Easter Bunny app has an egg-seeking GPS."

"You fool—I'm CIA, too!"

"Mother, I've sold the cow on the dark web for 3 bitbeans."

"I didn't have time to go shopping,so I just wrote him a nice check."

Hansel and Gretal.

The modern version.