Modern Student Gifts

'I can't play. I have to finish eReading this eBook for my eBook Report.'

I'm doing my essay on John Milton's "Paradise Lost"...the video game.

"Can we wait a few seconds? I'm downloading the Excuse App."

'This homework is a disgrace. I'd like a note from your computer.'

"I'm asking you to write your name on the board. Surely you don't need your smart phone to help you spell your name!"

Where your mind & battle are los

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

Computer Room.

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

'C'mon get it straight.'

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

Big Bang Theory.

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

Eternal Student.

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

The Bookworm

Burning the midnight oil.

Guitarist

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

Historical memory is on life support.

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."