Modern Romantic Gifts

'Did you get my Re: Marriage Proposal'

'Darling, how romantic...a pre-nup.'

'This is so sudden. I never had a chance to check you out on Facebook, Google and Myspace.'

'Singing to find a mate is so passe.'

"You texted me, how sweet...happy anniversary to you too, dear!"

'Do you John promise that your schedule, please put your iPhone away, will never be more important than your times together?'

"First you'll have to sign a prenup."

The I.M.s of Romeo and Juliet

'Did you just text me to tell me we don't talk anymore?'

'May I carry your flash drive to school for you?'

'Do you promise to have and to hold her, longer than the PS3?'

"The sad part is they're talking to each other."

Got suspicious after he asked to see a recent picture and she sent over an oil painting.

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."

'To learn more about me, swipe my forehead with your smart phone.'

"This just isn't working. Where do I click to unsubscribe?"

You may kiss the bride but be careful of her lip piercings.

"I'd love to spend more time with you, Jason, but you're not on my fall schedule."

Jason and Emily Forever - "They split up beforethe paint dried."

"Of all the women I've ever loved, Debbie, you're the most recent."

Technology and Love

"I just sent a penny to your bank account for your thoughts."

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

"I'm out of the closet but under the radar."

'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'

'Can I carry your computer disks to school?'

Modern Chivalry

Bride carrying her groom over the threshold

Rapunzel Experiments With Gender Presentation

"So after all of that, you're just looking for something casual?!"

"I didn't mind that his Valentine was a e-card. The big letdown was getting the box of e-chocolates."

I find that 10% of my dates leave the restaurant in a cab, 10% in an Uber car, and 80% in a huff. !

Brave New World of Telecommunications

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

"Tell the messenger I'm almost done with my sext."