Romance Modernist Gifts

"Forget the glass slipper thing. I've just installed the Tinderella app."

Right click for yes...

"I gotta be me!"

"Mr. Right!"

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

The Selfie

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

Online Dating

'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'

'After sex he checks his cell phone messages.'

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

"You may now kiss the bride."

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

'Let us pray...'

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

T.S. Eliot lacks the courage to eat a peach.

Technology and Love

Virginia could tolerate the Woolf whistles no longer

'-and the ceremony,dearest,your place or mine?'

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

Spooning

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

"Of all the wet cement, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks in mine."

'Have you two taken the COSMO 'compatibility test'?'

Updated fairy tales - "Cinderella." Dating Service. It's not often we get a client looking for a specific shoe size.

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

James Joyce.

"I'd love to spend more time with you, Jason, but you're not on my fall schedule."

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

"And do you, Stephanie, promise to love, honor and 'obey'?

'Throw in your iPad and you've got a deal.'

"I don't love you anymore, Barry, but I still think you're a great American."

"I was surprised myself, but living apart, seeing other people, and having virtually nothing to do with each other actually has made our marriage stronger."