Modern Policing Aficionado Gifts

"Wear a wire? Oh, no, all of our police informants have gone wireless."

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

'Oh no a speed camera.'

'Make it look like an accident.'

'Can I have your autograph...?'

"You're under arrest for breaking the law of gravity! You have the right to..."

'I'm in the not-so-serious crime squad, actually'

"I believe this is a case for Sherlock Holmes..."

Relax, I'm just here to pick up a prescription.

"You have the right to remain silent."

"Little Timmy is big enough to use you burglary tools."

Arcarde Patrol

"Police dramas just aren't what they used to be."

'Brilliant writing, Mr. Fenswick, but I'm afraid we'll have to pass on your 'How to Commit the Perfect Crime'!'

'Did you drop this £20 note, Sir?' 'Ooh, YES!' 'That will be a £50 fine.'

"C'mon man, you got the wrong species."

"I'm going out for beef chow mein - want anything?"

'Might as well get comfortable. The appeal process can take forever.'

"Tell me about your fear of policemen."

'I knew him before he became a police dog!'

It's amazing how people slow down when you point a hair dryer at them.

Police hiding in the ballot box.

Might Versus Right.

'Pretty much every case up here is a cold case.'

'I always return to the scene of the crime. Is that normal?'

'Get me two new officers to play good cop bad cop.'

"Hey, let's mix it up a bit today and have you be the bad cop."

"My son is a saint - he's always cooperating with the authorities."

Street trader tricking police.

"Where were you five minutes ago when someone was stealing my getaway car?"

"Maybe I'll get lucky and he'll be like everyone else and unfollow me."

"Hi honey, I'm home."

'Not so fast, Louie -- this may be a trap...'