Modern Office Gifts

'What shall I do with that? Our office has been paperless for 5 years.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

The trend toward less formal offices began to gain steam.

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'

Lumbar support animal

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

Presentation: Thinking each other are idiots.

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

'How did the 'I want you all to take a pay cut or leave' strategy go down?'

'I can't give you a raise, a promotion or a bigger office, but I AM going to allow you to have a personality.'

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

'Would you all please congatulate...'

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

"What's the problem? We told you when you started you'd have to make some sacrifices."

Home Business - Electric Stapler.

The vice-president in charge of sincerity

'Yes, we do have an incentive scheme.We call it 'continued employment'.'

'I recognize the face ... I just can't pin down the name.'

'I didn't come in to hear that I'm burning the candle at both ends. I came for more wax.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

"Yes sir, I'll admit I was sceptical about the whole 'mini-office' concept at first..."

Government Offices / In tray, No Exit tray.

Stop saying 'You're the boss' I KNOW I'm the boss!

''A desk job.' That's what they called it at the interview.' 'Same here.' 'SHH!'

'Tell your boss we represent an independent watchdog committee.'

"He treated associates like he treated his plants."

InIn by-products.

'You say you're willing to start at the bottom...'

If you really need permanent staff for IMMEDIATE cover then we could pull out all the stops and get someone by next October.