Modern Mystics Gifts

Fortune teller "Ah, yes, the internet is just coming through"

"You're on mute."

"Where should we target our advertising dollars? "Hold on, I'm checking my website."

"Do you have anything that will help me get rid of an irritating mantra?"

Vision Board: If you're reading this, it's not too late.

Hexting

'Glen Hoddle employs faith healer' "Remember the days we only had a magic sponge?"

Fortune teller using a computer.

'Ah, here's what went wrong with your lovelife. This satellite interferes with your chart!'

When the traditional and contemporary services overlap.

"Sorry - your guru isn't in at the moment, but please leave a message after the tone: Ommmmmmm....."

Crystal Ball Plug

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

Quantum Psychic

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

Wikipedia...

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

"Do you have an appointment?"

God's Phone

"All the celebrities come here."

Witches of Instagram

'Ok, give me your username & password one more time.'

"Welcome aboard - That'll be your work station over there."

Unicorn in the Woods

"We bring him gifts of gold, frankincense and mercantile mutual hedge fund options."

"I'm sorry, Master, but all my offers to grant your wishes are invalid under the laws of your state."

Europa takes a selfie

"Your grandma and I have decided to live together."

"We no longer use Astrology or crystal balls. We now use algorithms to predict the future."

Yogi back in 5.

"Have you tried turning off your conscious mind and then turning it back on again?"

'I think 'The Cloud' knows more thank you think.'

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'