Modern Media Musings Pillows

'I blame TV, computer games and the internet: None of my kids are bookworms...'

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, what is up with my hair?!"

'You're right, Mr. Benson, no question about it...I agree...yes! Absolutely! Yes...yes...'

Guys looks in the mirror and sees himself as a prisoner.

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

Three-way mirror

'This unexpectedly concludes tonight's program -- the sponsor bailed out.'

"Could you speed it up a little, the 'Seinfeld' marathon starts in five minutes."

'Sorry, folks...but our make-up artist didn't show up, so all the lies heard tonight will be bare faced.'

'There's nothing wrong with the sound, lady, it's a Party Political broadcast, that's all.'

'Books that stayed books.'

"Great, but where are all the books?"

RIP journalism

"Fine, but, what if we all took a vow of silence? Then how many monks would you see in cartoons?"

Pirated mirrors.

"Your eyebrows are beautiful, darling. I know you hate drawing them on."

"What do you mean 'well it certainly ain't you' - can you be more specific?"

'Ecce homo!'

"Let's take it step by step. How do I turn it on?"

'CD's: Manufactured pop groups as seen on tv!'

'You missed a spot, Honey...'

Donald Trump - Bluster Bus and Bernie Sanders- Substance Subcompact

"I own 60% of your image rights. Which means you have to pay me ten quid every time you look in the mirror."

Magritte realising he's going bald.

"Does this say 'Our Saviour', to you?"

Media Attention for Aliens

"The one and only truth!"

"I can't go to our high school reunion, no one will recognize me...Hell, I don't recognize me!"

"We've had to rename it, no one watches talk shows anymore."

'See what I mean? Your eyesight's fine, you just don't look very good.'