Modern Media Musings Gifts

'I blame TV, computer games and the internet: None of my kids are bookworms...'

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, what is up with my hair?!"

'You're right, Mr. Benson, no question about it...I agree...yes! Absolutely! Yes...yes...'

Guys looks in the mirror and sees himself as a prisoner.

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

Three-way mirror

'There's nothing wrong with the sound, lady, it's a Party Political broadcast, that's all.'

'Sorry, folks...but our make-up artist didn't show up, so all the lies heard tonight will be bare faced.'

"Could you speed it up a little, the 'Seinfeld' marathon starts in five minutes."

'This unexpectedly concludes tonight's program -- the sponsor bailed out.'

'Books that stayed books.'

RIP journalism

"Great, but where are all the books?"

"Your eyebrows are beautiful, darling. I know you hate drawing them on."

Bear painting himself as a teddy bear.

Pirated mirrors.

"Fine, but, what if we all took a vow of silence? Then how many monks would you see in cartoons?"

"What do you mean 'well it certainly ain't you' - can you be more specific?"

'Ecce homo!'

"Let's take it step by step. How do I turn it on?"

'CD's: Manufactured pop groups as seen on tv!'

Soldier in camouflage uniform looking in mirror and he can't see the uniform.

Donald Trump - Bluster Bus and Bernie Sanders- Substance Subcompact

"The one and only truth!"

"I can't go to our high school reunion, no one will recognize me...Hell, I don't recognize me!"

'You missed a spot, Honey...'

Media Attention for Aliens

Magritte realising he's going bald.

"We've had to rename it, no one watches talk shows anymore."

"Does this say 'Our Saviour', to you?"

"I own 60% of your image rights. Which means you have to pay me ten quid every time you look in the mirror."

Where do you see yourself in ten years?