Movie Musings Gifts

Action. "That's Entertainment." -Daily Scoop. I see they edited out the question mark.

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

Herman Mankiewicz

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

Working in the Hazard Zone!

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Housekeeping?!"

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"I got those famous last words you wanted"

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"Why don't you just go and see this summer's feel-good movie?"

'Harlow, why can't you be passionate like Mel Gibson?'

I haven't been down there since last Valentine's day. I want to check on a couple who asked me to rekindle their romance. A year ago I told them that thanks to me they'd be spending more time together and less time at their offices. I said I'd make it so they'd have lots of nights at home ordering some take-out and watching a movie. They must be very happy with me. All I did was shoot an arrow of love, but apparently they think I caused some sort of pandemic to happen!

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, what is up with my hair?!"

"The cape comes off too."

'One chatterbox, a natter natter and two shhhhh's please.'

'It's a 'Free Willy From Hollywood' petition: Would you please sign it...'

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

Guys looks in the mirror and sees himself as a prisoner.

'You're right, Mr. Benson, no question about it...I agree...yes! Absolutely! Yes...yes...'

The Directors Gut.

Relationship Rating: His and Hers

Barry Norman

"Which should we go see: the straight romantic comedy where the heroine's best friend is a gay man, or the gay romantic comedy where the hero's best friend is a straight woman?"

'I preferred her in the margarine commercial.'

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

'That's the last time I'm sitting in the front row!'

"Hibernate sounds better than binge watch."

"I do lover a good prawn film!"

"That was supposed to be us."

Planes, Trains, Automobiles, Zeppelins.

"Are there sharks in the water?"

'Mr. Kong?'

"I'm afraid that's a wrap for this session!"