Modern Maven Gifts

"Stay!"

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

"We went for Scandinavian interiors."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

"Someone, call the office and see if we can get a fresh carrot."

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

"First of all, let me commend everyone on the teamwork displayed on this icebreaker. Secondly, let me apologize for some of the motivational language I used during this session..."

Man carrying his boss.

"Despite years of management training john still found it difficult to give negative feedback."

The worker/the man who monitors the worker/the man who wrote the draft policy guidelines on how to monitor the man monitoring the worker.

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

"It's nice, but does it have a batcave?"

Man admires his Cubist Painting.

'Office of not much budget, and even less management! Yomp speaking!'

Jerk Gene

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"What kind of crazy management scheme is this?"

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

'How dare you accuse me of sinking this company?'

'With our marketing budget so limited our best chance is to make commercials that are SO bad that they'll go viral.'

'Hmm...this new management fad is crazy enough that it might just work...'

Categories are the key to organizing.

'Attention, all department heads: the buck stops there. I've had it!'