Modern Living Lover Pillows

'A World energy crisis is looming' "I blame the billions in the 3rd world wanting to get what we've got!"

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

Snoopy with Laptop

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

"Hey Scout, isn't ice fishing great?"

"You haven't enjoyed the Yule log till you've enjoyed it in high def."

Where do you see yourself five years from today, dork-boy? 43 Breen Road. What are you talking about? It's where everyone wants to go. It's the most popular AirBnB in San Francisco. The earliest opening they had was five years from today. Just book a hotel. Hotels are so 2007.

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

Happiness is spending late summer afternoon on a buying binge at the iPhone app store.

7 More Dwarfs

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

"I wonder what our self-cooking kitchen has for us today."

"Of course I love you, I'm just busy with other men."

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

'See I told you the garden was big enough for a table and chairs.'

'Do you Margaret take Charles to be your etc, etc, etc...just hit the 'I agree' button.'

"I'm basically happy but I'd like a most cost-effective personality."

Friday night was always sext night.

A mom watches as her children get into a large SUV using a staircase.

"By the time we can marry in all fifty states, we'll probably be divorced."

"No wonder it was so affordable."

"This is the main house, plus there's a cottage on the property where your Lyft driver would live."

'If I never get my 15 minutes of fame, I at least want a giant cutout face of myself.'

Modern Charm

Exec Has His Whole Life At His Desk

'You can't use the elevator as guestroom!'

'Everyone's depressed after income tax week, Cathy.'

"Why did we buy such huge furniture?"

'Please tell me there's more to this than this.'

"A messenger from the West Side, Your Highness."