Modern Lifestyle Navigator Pillows

'Not tonight, honey. I'm in a video conference.'

'This is kind of a bad time - could we have an affair AFTER tax day'

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"I shop, therefore I am."

No Immediate Danger

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"Did you get my tweet?"

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

The Modern Novel.

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"It says here that if you read stuff on an electronic device you can miss the big picture."

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

Bashful in Nashville

i-teddy

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

Fur Baby

'Fetching newspapers is over. Now I aggregate blogs for him.'

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

'Apparently it downloads data to your brain.'

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

'Mom, can you tell me about the days before Pilates and Latte's?'

"....Reception on my tablet is so much better since I added wifi to my mule..."

'This app tells me how near my friends are...'

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

"As soon as I reconfigure the router, I'll reset my WIFI connection, download and unzip my files, and then I can start the presentation on how to simplify your life!"

'Oh, relax. Stopping to ask how to use the GPS does not violate the male decree against asking directions.'

The Eternal Question