Modern-day Misinformer Pillows

Frankly, I'm surprised your newsagent let you go so far behind.

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"I thought you said I needed to get some 'extra size'."

"My guess it's guacamole."

Free speech isn't cheap!

So, if you don't get this mail because I wrote the wrong address again, please reply to me a.s.a.p. Best, Bob

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

"I meant the dog!"

"When you promised me 'a set of wheels', I assumed a company car."

Rumours Online

"So tell me, Wallace. Has someone gobbled up my Viagra again?" "No. Wait. I thought they were delicious candy mints!"

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

'The best way to protect your privacy is through a flood of misinformation obscuring the truth.'

"Ding dong means the witch is dead. Ding ding means dinner is ready."

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

'I meant bring your fishing tackle.'

After years of chasing and fighting they discovered it was all just a misunderstanding.

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

"For the last time, 'port' is left, 'starboard' is right!"

"Excuse me, but it's GREG, Greg Chalmers."

"This is not what I meant when I said 'let's chill'."

Jude completely misunderstands his doctor's request for a stool sample.

"OK, you're right. It does say take 2 tablets by mouth."

Anti-Vaxxers

"When you said you were taking me south on vacation I assumed you meant to the tropics."

When you said it was a place with women and a bar I didn't think you meant a ballet class.

"Aunt Mary, I think you may not have heard me right. I requested a bundt cake."

'Sir, I'm an estate agent. Not a showbiz agent.'

'Chapman, you misunderstood what I said about the Clark account. I said mull it over.'

Covid and Twitter

"What makes you think you can patronize me?"

Shoot...not literally, of course.

"Just wanted to make sure you said no mayo that way I'll know to give you extra."

The Embarrassment of Van Gogh

Fake news on social media