Modern-day Crusoes T-Shirts

'No. No. No. No, I'm happy with my current tariff, thanks.'

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

City Marathon.

On day twenty nine, Dave decided that he would start to cut his way through the dense forest to find out more about the north side of the island.

Anti-war libra.

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"I don't know what in blazes it means either, but just to be safe we'll put extra men on watch tonight."

"See. . .? We did do something."

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

'...youngsters need to be shown how the law REALLY works if they want a career in it!'

Holder Ooopsie

"Your Honor, gangsta rap made me do it."

'And this model has plenty of space for all your electronics and a landing pad for your drone.'

Olympic flame sending postcard - 'Wish I wasn't here.'

'You're under arrest for disturbing the peace.'

'We deliver all the justice you can afford.'

"Temperatures are rising."

'It wasn't like this when I left it!'

The SCOTUS six

Selling Justice

'Why don't you change it to sports or cartoons or something? -- You know CNN just depresses you.'

Virginia is for Haters.

'On your way back from the Holy Land, can you stop at Paris and pick up some creme brulee?'

Corrupted Politicians

As one of my last ceremonial functions... I now pardon these killers of unarmed men, women and children...

'Phew, now, where can i plug my mobile in?'

"What a coincidence, I'm opposed to the use of torture too."

'Isn't life simple when you know you're right all the time.'

"Wait a second- is that organic?"

The Six Stages of the Normalization Cycle

The Statue of Liberty holding up a pair of handcuffs

Conveyor belt takes solicitor along path to becoming a judge

'Can you get them on an e-reader?'

"What makes you think I'm the whistleblower?"