Modern David Gifts

David and Goliath(?)

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

Child on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

"How sweet, you texted me. . . I love you too!"

"Dammit Harold, you know I hate that mask!"

"C'mon, time to get up and stare at your devices all day."

The ten ammendments

"I have an app for that."

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

"Sure, this camp has swimming, games, fishing, horseback riding and rock climbing. But, does it have Wi-Fi?"

"....Reception on my tablet is so much better since I added wifi to my mule..."

"Sometime I find it hard to believe that we found each other through regular channels."

"Somebody in Boise needs my help. Run a credit check."

Pope Francis

No, Hal, I don't have a picture of you in my wallet, but much better than that...you're my screen-saver at work!

Modern Charm

'Dream-dates don't normally go for nightmares.'

"I'll take anything that connects to the internet."

Free WiFi

'Here, Santa. My wish list wouldn't fit on paper, so take this flash drive.'

'I'm too tired to listen to a story tonight, mom. Just e-mail something and I'll read it tomorrow.'

"He's standing upright and using a mobile phone. I think our evolution has begun."

'Sylvia, what do you say we take the big step and see if we could really stand one another offline...?'

A man outside of gents toilet sees sign: New Men - With Baby changing facilities.

"I have sent you all an e-mail of today's text if you wish to follow along."

'Our new neighbor an urban farmer.'

"Yes, Mom, I'm just finishing texting my payers now!"

Noah's ark is a Hummer.

"I'm on the range, but I'm not home on the range."