Modern Culture Lover T-Shirts

Elfie Stick

Great Chinese Dynasties

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

Omara Portuondo

World Tour.

'It's my homage to Picasso.' (Snowman is all mixed up with eyes and nose in odd places)

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

Fabrique en Francais (Made in France).

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'Great news, Dear! I've been traded to a think tank in California for a PhD Specializing in the Baltics!'

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

Dawing your Cellphone

Selfie Stick

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

Introducing Piza Island.

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

'Our goal is to stress di-versity while remaining a uni-versity.'

'He bowed lower for me than for you.'

"Then what happened?"

"Dammit Harold, you know I hate that mask!"

'What do you suppose he's trying to say?'

A couple looks at posters of Rio, Paris and Tokyo, all of which feature skyscrapers.

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'Some of these traditions don't half linger on.'

Final words on gravestones.