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The Art Critics

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

'It's my homage to Picasso.' (Snowman is all mixed up with eyes and nose in odd places)

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

Day for day i feel more and more empty.

Pouring all emotion into his art, Pablo had none left for his face.

Changing Room Decisions

'Wait, this isn't Monet's garden, it's Mondrian's.'

'What do you suppose he's trying to say?'

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

'How can they call it modern art when it's 100 year's old?'

"I thought I'd add a punch line."

Art Masters as Clowns pt. 2

"Typical venue, just providing male washroom facilities!"

Jackson Pollock as a child

'I think you've put that in the wrong place.'

Kapoor & Piss-poor (Anish Kapoor sculpture beside Marcel Deschamps urinal)

"He's left out the staples"

"The museum of modern art on fire... an installation."

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

Cubism Model

What do you think? I'm calling it Snow.

"Forget it - she's out of your league."

Smithsonian

Biker At Museum

'This is the painting he was about to start when he shot himself.'

"I like his style. He makes it look like an accident."