Mobster Fiction Enthusiast Gifts

'Boss, the perfect crime - we give fat Tony a pet alligator and years from now the 'gator eats Tony!'

He loves the water.

'Mark Antony addreses the mob'

'Try to think of this as a learning experience.'

Notorious gangsters, Bunny and Clyde.

"Don't worry, boss, he ain't gonna be takin' his shoes off on an airplane no more."

"Sorry, Boss, I thought you wanted me to make it look like an accident."

Mobster Dogs Burying Bones

Jonathan Bugsy Seagull

"I'll have the roasted chicken. Make it look like an accident."

"I'm a changed man, Lou - I'm wearing a wire AND a fitbit."

Practicing for the lie detector test...'I have only $800 in the bank. I was never in Chicago. I know nothing about the dog food business.'

"Louie 'Three Fingers,' Tony 'The Chin,' Joey Alfonso... Dang it, Vinny, you brought me the hit list instead of the grocery list!"

"It's all about the freezer storage space for Vinny."

'God's teeth - it's just not the same!'

"Why do they always do that with the concrete? The feet are the best part."

A holster of heavies

Ostritch Gangsters.

"It's all right. I was granted immunity."

'ARRRGH you idiot,you idiot!!' 'When i said take the Don out, i MEANT for lunch!!' (a stupid mob guy kills the boss)

"Are you the gent who complained about cold soup?"

'What's my husband like? -- Just imagine Tony Soprano without any money.'

Mafia's car

Cartoon Gangsters - I'm gonna have to get Lumpy to rub you out!

"How'd you get this number?"

"Remember - make it look like an accident."

Mobster tries to recruit Santa as a hitman.

"I'm Vinnie. I hear you got a little problem you want taken care of?"

Disorganized Crime

"Lose the tie, Vinnie—we ain't going legit after all."

"Wait - use a knife. It's greener."

Mobster R&D

"Have the pumpkin back midnight or else."

'Looks like a classic case of too much concrete.'

I don't care if the paint's not dry yet, Bob – I need my brass knuckles.