Mob Film Aficionados T-Shirts

"Oh, yeah? Well, we just put out a contract on you too!!!"

'Will you kindly remind the rest of the staff that I'm the managing director - not the Godfather!'

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

"We need rain."

"Honey, this is serious, we need to text."

'Mark Antony addreses the mob'

"All I can figure is that he must have been inspecting the water quality of our lakes and rivers when he became entangled in cement."

"Although the depiction of gangland activity in this film is not accurate over all, I would like to go on record as saying that I am not entirely displeased with Mr. Robert De Niro's portrayal of a gentleman whom I take to have been a former associate of yours truly."

"Paper or plastic?"

"If a tree falls in the forest and hits a certain individual, would he still be able to testify?"

'Take me to your leader -- I've got an offer he can't refuse!'

Our cover is francophile liberals

Mafia Family Life: 'I'm sorry dear - but I had to bring some work home!'

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

'... and make it look like an accident.'

"Gap... Tony Soprano fit"

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

The Mafia Goes Green.

'Tonight's special presentation, 'The Myth of the Mafia,' was made possible by a grant from the Gambino family.'

"Do you want to order a contract killing, Don Carlos, or a pay-as-you-go killing?"

There's been a misundertanding-we're advertising for GAGSTERS!'

"Stop pretending you have Mob connections."

"The weeds - I want 'em whacked."

"I'm gonna make him an offer he could refuse but won't because he's afraid of conflict."

'You're not a very good listener, are you?'

Organised Crime A.G.M.

". . .or, you can juggle a world record 6 balls, 6 rings and one barking bichon and we call it a day."

Mafia Shrinks

"I've been sent to rub you out pal..."

"You're gonna put me on that Nice List. Capeesh?"

The Unacceptable Face of Tailoring

'Hi. I'm Don.'